Upshot
by Gemelli22
Summary: Rachel is taking a year off college to try her luck in Broadway, not knowing that her luck will turn out to be very good -or very bad- when she runs once again into Jesse St James.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Rachel made a list of pros and cons. She needed to show her dads that her decision had been well thought of, and carefully planned. She needed to convince them somehow, and her charms alone weren't enough for the magnitude of what she was asking for.

_Pros:_

-Have free time to go to auditions

_Cons:_

-Will not finish BA in 1 year

-Will miss 1 more year of learning at the best school

-Cannot live in dorm, need to find an apartment

-Cannot eat in dining hall, need to cook or eat out

-Will need to take taxis or the subway

"Hmmmm… This isn't going to work. I'll have to rely on charm alone." she thought as she crumpled the list she just made and tossed it in the trash.

It was already April, and Rachel had to convince her dads before registering for the next year. But spring break was just around the corner and it was the perfect time to do it, so she hopped on a train on a Thursday afternoon, and in only 20 hours she would be back home. Breaking the news that she wanted to take a year off college when she only needed one more year to finish would be cataclysmic for her dads. But she was positively sure she would prevail, even though she knew it wouldn't be easy, after all, she learned all about being a drama queen from both her dads.

They had just finished dinner, and after giving the news, she stayed quietly sitting gauging their reaction to see how much more she could push the subject. Leroy's reaction was not good. "I don't understand what you're saying, Rachel Barbra Berry!" he said as he pushed his chair back from the table and stood up dramatically. Meanwhile her other daddy Hiram stayed in his chair covering his face with his hands (also dramatically).

"Please, just try to put yourselves in my shoes for a second! There are four –FOUR- shows that are starting early next year, and I need time to audition, I can sense my break coming! Normally, just one or two shows start in a year, but to have FOUR new shows is a rare event that I must partake of. It probably will be a once in a lifetime opportunity, and if I miss it I'll live full of regret for the rest of my life!" she said full of emotion and –what else- drama.

"But Rachel, honey" said Hiram "you just have to hang in there for just one more year…"

"Daddy, I know, but I don't want to sit by watching the opportunities coming and going just because I have to finish college! It will only be a year, and if I don't get any respectable part within that year, I'll go back and finish college. In the grand scheme of things, a year is almost imperceptible!"

"OK, let's say for the sake of argument that you take a year off, you don't get any parts, and you go back to college, who's going to pay for it? You know that we won't be able to foot the $50,000.00 plus expenses by ourselves…"

"Nothing to worry about, Daddy, I already talked to my counselor and she said my scholarship will grant me a year of sabbatical without any financial or academic consequences since I've maintained a 3.8 GPA for the past three years."

She was sure she covered all her bases before coming home.

"We need to think about this and discuss it among ourselves. We'll give you the answer tomorrow morning" said Hiram thus finishing the conversation.

Rachel never thought it would be so easy to convince her dads, and went to bed relaxed and satisfied, the answer would be yes, she was sure.

The next morning her dads awoke her with breakfast in bed. She had learned the joys of sleeping late in college, and that meant sleeping until 7:30 am, and sometimes even 8:00 am.

"Sweetie, we've thought about it and it seems that you are making a well informed and planned choice, and we trust you completely, but we still need to set some written ground rules to make sure you'll be safe outside of NYU."

Rachel was beside herself and hugged both her dads tightly. "Thank you, thank you… You won't regret this!" She was victorious as always, never underestimating her powerful charming ways. She would be free to audition for a whole year!

College had gone by in a whirlwind for her, and she had managed to make some friends there. She barely kept in touch with her friends from Lima, the only one she spoke with regularly was Finn, and they didn't have much to talk about, since Finn's knowledge of Rachel's new life was limited.

She found out about the four plays that were opening from her best friend from college Mark, who came up with the idea and was also taking the year off. They had met during their freshman orientation and had become inseparable since then. Mark was a blend between Kurt Hummel and Duckie from "Pretty in Pink": very extravagant, very fashionable and a great friend. He was extremely good looking, and Rachel thought of him as a very gay version of Jesse St James. Mark knew that Jesse had broken Rachel's heart, that he was insanely talented, and that he went to UCLA. He also knew that Rachel still had feelings for him, even though she denied it vehemently every time the subject came up.

After the school year ended, Rachel moved out of her dorm and into what could be considered as either a tiny apartment or a big closet, the rent was very high but it was on a good neighborhood and quite close to the places where she'd be auditioning. Mark also moved nearby with two roommates, and he and Rachel planned to go to every audition together.

Rachel knew that she would really take advantage of the coming year: at long last she was one step closer to her dream.


	2. Chapter 2

**I don't know about you guys, but I'm not really loving Rachel this season. She's never been happier just because the dumbest guy in school chose her over Quinn? I really want to slap her! Hard!**

* * *

**CHAPTER 2**

Most Broadway stars are either highly creative free spirits, or had type A personalities. Rachel and her friend Mark belonged to the second group: they were highly organized, had everything planned, and were borderline obsessed with becoming Broadway stars. They made lists of everything: auditions, agents, even coffee shops on and nearby the theater district. They had also "interviewed" their drama and music professors to get information on what to expect on auditions, and both had done extensive internet research on the subject and were prepared for anything. Everything was planned.

The only thing that Rachel had neither prepared nor planned for was running into Jesse St James.

* * *

Rachel had told her dads about 4 new shows, and she wasn't lying, but she wasn't telling the whole truth either. There also were a few revivals, and many other shows that were opening off Broadway. Rachel and Mark wanted to attend every audition, even if that meant they wouldn't have a life for the next year: this was their big shot.

She was quite surprised when she went for the first audition: she was expecting a difficult process and a competitive atmosphere, but this was definitely cutthroat. On that first audition day, there was a line that went around the block, and the people there weren't exactly friendly. At least she was with Mark, and they kept each other company during the long hours waiting for their turn. They were still outside when it started raining, and barely had time to dry their faces when their audition was up. Mark had the advantage of even looking sexy with his wet hair swept back and his beautiful face fresh, but Rachel looked like a wet raccoon, and she didn't feel her usual confidence when singing. Her sheet music was almost ruined. The soaking wet dancing shoes didn't help with the dance routines either.

But Rachel was unfazed, and thereinafter made sure she was carrying a rain cape with a hood, an umbrella, shoe covers and plenty of snacks and water.

Only two weeks of auditions had transpired when Rachel got her first call back: they wanted her to read for a part. She couldn't do much research on the part, since it was a new play, but she was prepared for anything, and her almost encyclopedic knowledge on Broadway would help her get into any character. Mark didn't have any auditions that day and went with her.

Apparently, the casting director had called back a lot of people, and the line went once again outside the theater. Rachel was prepared when it started raining; she was prepared when the hours went by without lunch: but she wasn't prepared to see him.

Mark was standing at her side holding a big umbrella, and her rain cape hood was over her head. He said something about there being a lot of good looking guys on the line, and she instinctively turned her head to look. She thought she saw him on the line a few places behind her, it had to be Jesse. She turned her head back quickly. He also had a hoodie over his head, but she could recognize that smile anywhere. She didn't think he saw her, so she concentrated on hiding in front of Mark and soon enough she was safely inside. Mark had never seen Rachel so nervous about an audition, and knowing that it was best not to talk, he just stood there with his arm around her.

After she read her part, she took every precaution possible not to meet with him again, she just told Mark there was someone she didn't want to see so he helped her hide, her hood and now a scarf almost covering her face while he guided her out.

They walked silently to her apartment, where she just sat in front of her small dining table and stared at the door, like if she was afraid Jesse would walk through it any second. Mark prepared some hot tea and sat beside her.

"What's wrong, Rachel? I've never seen you like this, you look like you've just seen a ghost."

She looked at him now. "Almost. I saw him, Mark, I saw Jesse."

"Jesse St James? He's here in New York?"

"I guess so…." She said as she covered her face with her hands, she was crying now.

"But Rachel, come on, you haven't seen or heard from the guy in like, how many years?"

"Four. Four years. I don't know what's wrong with me, I'm just…."

Now she was crying so much she couldn't even talk. Mark had never seen Rachel cry like this, and he was scared.

"Sweetie, what's wrong? What did he do to you that you're like this?"

After a few minutes, she could talk again.

"Nothing, he didn't do anything I haven't told you about, but I wasn't ready to see him, I guess it's all the memories… I just feel like crying…"

Her friend held her for a long time and she cried all the tears she'd been bottling up inside for four years. She cried for a long time, until she fell asleep on the couch beside Mark.

When she looked at her reflection on the bathroom mirror, she wanted to cry again, but not for Jesse, but because she looked like hell. Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy and her entire face was red. When she came out of the bathroom after a long shower that made her feel a little better, Mark had already made some coffee. She looked better now.

"Sweetie, what happened to you last night? That was scary!"

"Oh, don't worry, I just never thought I'd run into him, I mean, I knew it was a possibility, but not know, maybe in a few more years… I don't know what got into me…"

"Honey, denial ain't a river in Egypt… You still have feelings for the guy!"

"No, no, no. Maybe, I don't know, but it doesn't matter. I'm not going to let him see me like this EVER. I need to prepare."

"But how will you prepare? Besides, New York is a big city, and chances are…"

"No. He's auditioning just like we are, I know I'll see him again, and I need to be prepared." She said while opening a tiny closet. "Help me with that box."

There he was: his face on pictures, concert tickets, sheet music. Rachel felt like crying again, she felt an old, deep, forgotten wound open all over again when she saw his beautiful eyes, his smile, his hair. After all that time she still missed him. But she was better now, stronger, prouder, more confident, and she had polished her acting skills.

Rachel spent the whole day researching for her most difficult part yet: being ready to face Jesse St James. She googled him, saw his facebook profile and pictures thanks to her computer savvy best friend, and even asked her mom. Shelby had been trying really hard to bond with her daughter, since falling in love with baby Beth helped her see how important Rachel also was. She had also kept in touch with Jesse, so she confirmed to Rachel that he was also in NY.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, I thought Jesse was banned from our conversations, and since you never asked…"

"What else do you know about him?"

"Well, he recently graduated from UCLA, and now he's doing the same thing you are, auditioning in Broadway. I knew it was a matter of time before you guys ran into one another. Did he see you? What did you talk about?"

"I don't know if he saw me, and as far as I know, I'll be surprised if he even remembers who I am…"

"Please, of course he does, Rachel. He always asks about you, you are not a banned subject in my conversations with Jesse. As a matter of fact we always end up…"

"Okay, okay, I don't need to know anything else. So when is Beth starting Kindergarten?"

Shelby knew the ban was back on, and humored her daughter. But somehow Rachel felt better now.

* * *

The next day, while having breakfast at a café, Rachel told Mark all about her plan on how to face Jesse, in case she ever ran into him again. She did not tell her friend that she was actually looking forward to that moment, because she wouldn't even admit it to herself.

Being as disciplined as she was, she restrained herself from looking at his facebook profile every day, and just looked on Sundays, the most boring day of the week in her opinion. Two months had gone by, and he was still apparently single, even though he was tagged in a lot of girls' pictures…

Rachel had let her guard down a little, Jesse no longer in her mind all the time. She loved going to auditions, even though more than one casting director had told her after singing her heart out "Good voice, but too Jewish", or "too small" and even "too regular". She didn't care, she was absolutely sure she would be "discovered" soon.

She was sitting with Mark and his roommates at their favorite coffee shop when suddenly she heard HIS voice behind her:

"Rachel?"

* * *

**Ok, you all know that I need to make them co-stars of a play, but which one should I choose? Your opinion is highly valued, so please let me know ASAP! Reviews are love, so love me a little : )**


	3. Chapter 3

**This is a short chapter, but I'll update tomorrow again! This one is lighter than my previous fic, less angst and possibly more of the good stuff!**

* * *

Rachel?"

It was him, it was Jesse. She had looked at pictures of him, even heard him singing on youtube videos; she thought she was ready. But hearing her name coming out from his mouth made her chest tighten, and her heart beat uncontrollably. She was definitely not ready for this reaction.

"Rachel?" he said once more.

Rachel turned her head to look at him.

"Jesse? Jesse St James? Oh my god!" she exclaimed while standing up. He was dumbfounded, he didn't know if she was going to throw the hot tea she was drinking to his face, but when he saw her smile back at him, he opened his arms to greet her and she did the same thing, putting her hands on his shoulders, in what could be construed as a polite hug between old friends, and separated quickly.

"Wow, Rachel…. It's so good to see you!"

It was almost impossible for Jesse to look better than he did when he was 17, but he actually looked better. His skin was tanned, his hair a little bit lighter and longer. He still dressed the same, in fact, he was still wearing his old leather jacket.

"I know, Jesse, it's good to see you too…" she was smiling nervously, and Jesse opened his arms once again and pulled her into another embrace, this one more intimate. Rachel now put his arms around his neck, her hands in his head, and buried her face in nook of his neck, inhaling his scent. Jesse in turn buried his face in her hair, and held her closer; he felt in that moment that he just got home after taking a long, long trip, she just felt like home.

"Huhmmmmm…." Mark interrupted after a while.

Rachel once again separated from Jesse, still smiling nervously, and introduced her friends:

"Jesse this is Mark, Dominic and Alex. Everyone, this is Jesse St James, an old friend from high school."

"Nice to meet you, why don't you sit with us, Jesse, we were about to leave and maybe you could keep Rachel company for a while…" Mark's friends now gave him a weird look, they were not ready to leave, but they didn't know about her latest plan either.

After leaving a few dollars for tip, they stood up from the table and said goodbye to Rachel and Jesse.

"Don't forget the plan." Mark whispered to her after kissing her cheek. "I'll pick you up later, baby." She just nodded.

Now Rachel and Jesse were seated side by side on a round booth. They were looking at each other and smiling, and Rachel forgot all about her plan. She thought about that moment, when she would face Jesse again, probably hundreds of times. She thought she would still be mad at him for that repugnant egg attack, for playing her, for abandoning her the way he did. But she wasn't.

"So what are you doing?" Jesse said, breaking the ice.

"We're taking a year off to go to all the auditions we can get into!"

"You took a year off school to audition? That's unlike you, Rachel, to leave something unfinished… But I guess you're doing the same thing I'm doing, taking advantage of the opportunity of a lifetime."

His words stung her a little and she retorted immediately.

"At least I know I'll finish my BFA someday, because it's definitely not like me to leave things unfinished, I've always thought closure is very important in order to move on. It's a shame that sometimes simply it's not up to you, but even then, you must do what you can to find a sense of satisfactory conclusion…" She was looking at him squarely in the eyes, as he took his eyes away from her to look at the table.

"Yeah, one nail drives out another…" Now he looked at her in earnest. "I really regret what I did to you Rachel, If I had the power to go back in time, I would've done everything so differently, but…"

"But what, Jesse?" Now she was pissed.

"God, Rachel, I've had this conversation with you hundreds of times in my mind, and yet I never thought I'd sound this stupid actually doing it!"

Rachel's expression softened a bit.

"I'm not justifying my actions, they were awfully wrong, I know that. But maybe if you understand why I acted so incredibly stupid, you'll be able to somehow forgive me one day."

She just looked at him unconvinced.

He squinted as if not to see her pained expression while he talked.

"I was dreadfully jealous, Rachel. Jealous and mad. You and Finn… The whole club… I never felt like I fit in there, and you… forget it, I'm just so sorry Rachel, so sorry"

He sounded sincere, and she didn't feel ready to continue talking about that specific subject. She had a thousand questions, but it was too much for her, too many emotions she hadn't experienced in a long time, and she wasn't about to start crying in front of him.

She put her hand on top of his arm, as if pleading him to stop talking.

"It's okay Jesse, I'm okay. So tell me about the auditions you've been to. Isn't it crazy?"

He smiled gratefully, this was a touchy subject for him too. And he was so happy to see her, she looked exactly the same, but with a better fashion sense. Her hair was shorter, and she had bangs now. She even more beautiful.

They talked for a long time, mostly about auditions, shows, college. Rachel didn't want to go, but she knew she had to.

"Jesse, I'm so glad I ran into you, but I have to go now…"

"Can I walk you home?" Wishful thinking, he knew, but he had to ask.

"No, don't worry, Mark is picking me up, we have to get ready for a party later tonight."

He could feel jealousy gnawing at his stomach, especially when he saw that the good looking guy sitting with her earlier was back, now kissing Rachel on the cheek and putting his arm around her possessively before acknowledging him. Who was this Mark, her boyfriend, her roommate, just a friend?

"Well Jesse, it was nice meeting you Jesse!"

No, this wasn't happening, Rachel was leaving and he didn't know how to ask for her number, he needed to see her again, there were so many things they still needed to talk about… So he scribbled his number on a small napkin and just put in her hand while he was kissing her cheek goodbye.

They left in different directions, Rachel with her arm behind Mark's waist, Jesse alone. But she looked back over her shoulder for a second, and sure enough he was still looking at her. She just smiled and kept going, now looking at the folded napkin in her hand, where he wrote "Please call me" and his number.

Rachel called him a week later. Now that the initial shock of the encounter was over, she felt stronger than ever. And her plan was back on.

* * *

**Okay, it's inevitable to make them co-stars soon, and after carefully considering your opinions, I'm down to SA and Wicked. Of course SA has been used in almost every future fic out there, but it's just perfect for them, as is Wicked, which I think has only been used a couple of times. Let me add that I intend to give SA, if I use it, a twist that I don't think has been used before! So readers, it's completely up to you, vote for your favorite, Spring Awakening or Wicked!**


	4. Chapter 4

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**This is some mind candy for you, just because you've been so awesome with your reviews! Enjoy!**

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Jesse couldn't take his eyes off Rachel's lips. Her full, sensual, plum colored lips. For the first time since he met her, he wasn't really paying attention to what she was saying; instead he was fantasizing about kissing her lips, biting and licking that sexy bottom lip… At that moment, she wasn't sweet Rachel Berry, the petite brunette with big eyes and an even bigger voice; she was just a sex goddess that he just wanted to screw the brains out. And he was grateful that they were still waiting for the main course, maybe if he thought of something else there was enough time to get rid of the biggest hard on he'd had in a long time, and thanks to the table no one would notice the bulge in his pants.

"God, men are so predictable…" was all Rachel could think while she was rambling nonsense about a casting director. Men were just easy prey, a mop with red lips and breasts would be enough to turn them on. But she was very happy, her plan was working flawlessly.

She had called him a week after they had met in the coffee shop, and said something to the effect of "want to do something with me" to which he replied immediately with a dinner invitation. That was easy, just as planned.

She had spent that afternoon shopping with Mark, who was a coveted shopping partner in their group of friends, as he was a style guru often compared to a young Tim Gunn. Mark had chosen a spectacular red mini dress "Gotta show those legs, honey", paired with incredibly high and pricey stiletto platforms. True, she would have to refrain from her daily coffee shop treats for a while, but when she looked in the mirror she knew it was worth it, she looked damned hot. That night and the next morning she underwent several beauty treatments from the very capable hands of Mark and his roommates. Dominic was an intern in one of New York's trendiest beauty salons: he made sure to style Rachel's hair to make her look as sexy as possible, and even though she hated hair products, the final result was worth it. They spent a lot of time applying makeup, only to leave her looking as if she only had a bit of lipstick and mascara. After looking at herself in the mirror for a final time, she knew her friends had nailed it to a tee, she looked, and felt perfect. "Honey, you know I don't dig chicks but you look so hot I could consider doing you a favor…" said Mark right before she left.

"Thanks, but no thanks…"

She took a cab to meet him at the restaurant; she didn't want him to know where she lived.

She smiled when she saw him walking towards her cab to open the door once she got there, and then smiled even more when she saw him gawking at her as she stepped out the cab. She was a little surprised and very flattered at the way he was looking at her, she was sure he'd been with tons of leggy blondes.

Now Jesse was in deep trouble: they were waiting for the check and his hard on had gotten impossibly harder. If he could only go discreetly to the restroom, he was sure he could get rid of the problem in less than 30 seconds, he was that horny. But he didn't know how to get up without her noticing, and she kept licking her own lips… Tears of happiness almost fell out of his eyes when an older woman approached Rachel and distracted her enough for him to escape for a minute, it was her guidance counselor at NYU, and after the introduction, he excused himself and literally, off he went.

"Damn" She thought, great timing, he was able to escape. She knew the effect she was having on him, she kept lifting her arm to rub the back of her neck seductively, licking her lips and touching his arms or hands as often as she could. He was trying too hard to act nonchalant, she could see the lust in his eyes. This was also affecting her, of course, but girls were the lucky ones in this sort of predicament, and thankfully some wise woman had invented pantyliners, which she was sure she needed to remove before leaving the restaurant. He looked fastidiously groomed: just shaven, that perfect hair, his big, beautiful hands, his sexy voice…

"Nice meeting you, Mrs. Andrews!" Thank god for that woman, Jesse thought.

"Do you want another glass of wine, or do you want to take a stroll outside?"

"No, let's walk" Rachel knew well that another glass of wine would break her resolve.

It was colder than expected outside, and it showed: her nipples stood out and Jesse removed his jacket and put it around her shoulders, this was not helping. He gave it a shot.

"Do you want to go back to my place for a while? It's almost too cold to keep walking… I want to show you the sheet music for "Yes Sir", it's still very hard to find" once again, wishful thinking.

Great, the moment she had been waiting for, her plan finally coming to fruition.

"That would be great, I can't wait to get my hands on it!" Oh, she was good…

The cab ride was quite uncomfortable for him: her skirt rode up and she kept looking at him sexily, they barely talked on the ride to his apartment.

His place was great. It was ten times the size of her tiny apartment: having a two bedroom apartment on a good neighborhood in New York cost a lot, Rachel figured his parents were footing the bill, as were hers. To top it all, he had a great view of the city, one that only an apartment on a twenty-eighth floor could afford. She had removed his jacket, and was now standing in front of a floor-to-ceiling window taking in the spectacular view.

She saw his reflection coming up to her, and then felt him behind her, placing his arms around her waist.

"Do you like the view" he almost whispered in her ear, as she instinctively lifted her head as his hands caressed the side of her face and her neck.

She turned around. Everything was going according to what she now considered her stupid little plan. She would seduce him, make him beg for more and then she would leave him yearning for what he couldn't have.

"Jesse…"

That was all the encouragement he needed to lean down and kiss her, tentatively at first, waiting for her reaction. Her lips were warm and soft and inviting, and when he felt her tongue thrusting into his mouth, he almost lost it. It was as if she was fighting to take over the kiss, and he had no problem relinquishing his power to her. Her fingers buried in his hair, she couldn't take it anymore when he started kissing her neck and touching her breasts over the dress. She let out a soft moan that encouraged him further, she could feel the bulge in his pants straining against her as he lifted her up and placed her on top of the dining table, never taking his mouth off hers.

She didn't know what could've possessed her to start hastily unbuttoning his shirt, as he undid the halter top of her dress and cupped her now naked breasts, his hungry mouth stiffening her moans as he pinched her nipples with his fingers before lowering his mouth to them.

She couldn't take it any longer, and what he said next felt like a wake up slap to her face.

"Rachel, I want you so bad…"

"Stop, please, you have to stop now."

She pushed him gently while pulling the top of her dress to her neck.

"But, what…wait. Sorry, this is going too fast. I know, let's just take things slower…"

"No Jesse, I don't want to take things slower, it's all a game, can't you see? I had this amazing plan where I would seduce you and leave you wanting for more, but it's not working. I can't do this, I'm not like you, I'll never be like you."

He was now very confused.

"I just wanted to give you a taste of your own medicine, to show you what it feels like to be left alone unexpectedly, wanting someone who didn't want you back. But this is not working, I just can't do this Jesse, I'm not like this. I'm sorry… I have to go now."

She hurried out the door and out of his life as fast as she had gotten in. Little did she know, her stupid plan had worked perfectly, not only had she left him wanting her more than ever, but she had managed to break his heart in the less than fifteen minutes they had spent in his apartment.

* * *

**Awww, come on, stop the flames, you knew I had to stop it, I can't write after the UST and angst are gone! Be nice! : )**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all for your wonderful reviews and your suggestions, they are well appreiated! **

**In my fiction universe, Wicked has been on hiatus for a while! And of course, ION (I own nothing)**

Jesse St James never cried. He had no need for crying, he just wasn't emotional, and he'd rarely felt those emotions that are usually accompanied by tears. That is why he didn't cry until the next day after Rachel left.

Last time he remembered feeling like that was probably the day he thought Rachel deserved an egg smashed to her forehead, just because he thought she was defying him, and why would she do that when she was back in the stupid caveman's arms in no time. But when he saw her broken face, with egg yolk and shells coming down her forehead he knew how stupid he had been, how mistaken, for thinking all the wrong things. He managed to get home, the strong feeling in his chest so foreign to him that he didn't recognize what was happening. He only knew that his insides hurt, and his eyes were burning, and when he put his still dirty hands to his eyes and felt the now drying and smelly yolk in his face, the tears just came out and he could not stop them for a while.

The night she left he just stayed there dumbfounded, trying to comprehend what had happened, and why he felt that strange feeling in his chest. He decided to shower when dawn was breaking, and even though the hot water felt good on the outside, the pressure inside his chest was growing. A few hours later, the tears he hadn't cried for the last four years poured out of him when he came to the realization that he was feeling what she had felt all those years ago, and it was a terrible feeling. Her words "I'm not like you, I'll never be like you" still cut him deeply, and he felt that underneath his cool and composed exterior he was nothing but a fool.

* * *

Rachel didn't shed a tear. She had cried all the tears she could have for Jesse St James already. Even then, she realized that her plan, her stupid vendetta could never fulfill its purpose, for she felt worse than ever. She imagined Jesse was nothing more than a talented philanderer and he deserved what he got, but she felt it all went wrong. Jesse seemed genuinely interested in her, and the fact that they shared a connection was undeniable. Her stupid plan and all that she had put in motion in order to execute it left her feeling like nothing but a fool.

Her mom called her a week later, she had a letter from Jesse for her. Apparently Jesse had called her begging for her number or address, but Shelby wouldn't even give him her e-mail address, and he had to settle to have her deliver a letter to Rachel.

A good, old fashioned letter. Rachel barely used her mailbox, but when her mom told her to expect a letter, she checked it every single day until she got it. She nervously opened it, afraid that if she wasn't careful enough the paper would somehow dissolve, silencing its contents forever.

"I'm so sorry Rachel.

I'm sorry for not understanding until last Friday how much I'd hurt you.

I'm sorry for having expecting you to act as if nothing had happened, as if we were really old friends.

I hope one day you'll be able to forgive me.

Love,

Jesse"

She held the piece of paper to her chest, and felt like a big weight had been lifted of her shoulder, she guessed that is what forgiveness felt like.

* * *

Six months and twenty two days had gone by since her year off college had started when Rachel got her second call back. It was for a role on the revival of "Wicked", and Rachel was beside herself. The casting people didn't tell her exactly for which role, but her intuition – and the fact that she looked a lot like the original actor- told her it she would be reading for Elphaba, even though she'd gladly settle for Nessarose.

She had been going to auditions on her own for a while, since Mark was casted to replace the Melchior for the "Spring Awakening" national tour a few months back, and although she missed him exceedingly, she never deviated from her original plan.

This time, there were no long lines on the theater.

"Miss Rachel Berry?"

"Yes?"

"Please come here, we need you to read for two parts, Elphaba and Nessarose. Let's start with the latter, please."

She was guided to a stage and started reading for Nessarose. Then, after reading for Elphaba's part, she was instructed to wait for a while, since the director wanted to see her interaction with the actor cast as Galinda. Anna, the actor portraying Galinda was probably only two inches higher than she was, blonde and beautiful: a petite, blue eyed version of Quinn Fabray.

Fiyero was yet to be cast.

She read for the scene with Galinda after the party, and the chemistry between both actors was very good: no one could tell they were not old friends. She left the theater with the promise of another callback, even though deep down she knew the part was hers. Rachel got the best news of her life the next day: she would be the next Elphaba! Her dads were so excited they flew to New York to celebrate with their daughter.

The casting director had a hard time casting Fiyero: the only actor who could really sing and act had no chemistry whatsoever with Rachel, and the others lacked either in the acting, singing or looks department. They were desperate until they heard of an actor who would be a good fit for the part, but he was already starring on a mediocre play off Broadway. After watching the play, the director made a few calls to have him audition and read for the part on the same day, Jesse St James looked promising.

Rachel wasn't surprised when she was told the name of the actor auditioning for the part. She knew deep down inside that he would be a perfect fit. But Jesse was in for a surprise, he never suspected Rachel was Elphaba.

After singing and dancing, Jesse had to read for the part. After waiting a for a while following the initial reading, he was told to read with the actor cast as Elphaba. He felt an adrenaline rush when he saw her walking towards him in the stage, wide smiled and beautiful. He knew at that instant that if Rachel was Elphaba, he would undeniably be Fiyero.

"Rachel!" he said while pulling her into a hug. Incredibly there was no oddness in their encounter, now that the past was somehow cleared between them, they were now just old friends.

The director was intrigued. "From where do you know each other?"

"We were both in show choirs back in Ohio…" he answered without taking her eyes off Rachel.

She just kept smiling and nodded.

"Good, good. Okay, Jesse, I don't know if you were told that we have included some changes to the production, now Elphaba and Fiyero spend more time together, and the scene in the forest has been modified. Let's see how's the chemistry between you two."

They both sang "As Long As You're Mine", and the director was so impressed by the way their voices harmonized together, they didn't even have to kiss at the end.

"Congratulations, Mr. St James, looks like you're the new Fiyero!"

And that's how Rachel and Jesse were able to put the past behind and start again from zero. Almost.

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**Sorry for the short, shoddy chapter, it's just that real life is really interfering with my writing... : ) I'm not going to get sad if I don't get any reviews, I know this seriously sucked, and I promise to make it up to you guys ASAP!**

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**CHAPTER 5 **


	6. Chapter 6

**This chapter is not that great either, but the good news is that the next chapter is longer and much better, and I'll update it tomorrow! So be nice and review!**

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CHAPTER 6

"Wow, it's you. With glasses. Jesse, since when do you wear glasses, or is this a fashion statement or something?"

"Nah, I've always used glasses you just didn't know about it! I always wear contacts, but I've been kind of busy lately and ran out unexpectedly. Do you really think wearing glasses is some kind of fashion statement? Please, I can't wait to get Lasik once I'm older!"

"Well, I kind of like them, they make you look interesting… Not that you don't look interesting the rest of the time, it's just that it's a whole new different look for you… What?"

Jesse was just smiling at her, he was just realizing after four and a half years how much he missed their banter.

"Nothing, nothing, keep going on about how interesting do you think I am…"

"Jesse!" she punched him once in his arm lightly, and then punched him again when that silly smile was still on his face.

"I'm just still full of surprises, Rachel!"

But the truth was that Jesse could not stop smiling because he'd never been so happy. It had been two weeks since he was cast as Fiyero, and his life was just perfect: not only was he part of one of his all time favorite musicals, but he also got to see her every day. And just being around her made him happy.

* * *

Their interaction at the beginning had been awkward at best; the last time they'd been together didn't quite end in a good way, and even though they both felt the air was cleared between them, deep down both knew it wasn't. Rehearsals were somehow uncomfortable, especially the now longer forest scene which was modified to include a semi-nude: after finishing the song, Fiyero would start undressing Elphaba so that the audience could see her naked green back while she removed his shirt, then they would kiss and lay down before the lights went off.

The scene went great until they had to kiss: their kisses were lukewarm, not really passionate, since neither wanted to cross that line again. The director, whom everyone called JR noted there was something off and vented his frustration accordingly.

"Guys, I'm not feeling this, it's bland and boring and you'll have the audience sleeping by the time the lights go out! I need passion, fervor, eagerness, and I'm not getting any. We'll start rehearsing this scene in costume soon so that you get used to taking each other's tops quickly. Jesse, this is not Rachel, a delicate flower, this is Elphaba, the object of your affection, the love of your life! You haven't seen her in two years, you really want to get in to her pants! And I know you two have chemistry, it just fizzles at the wrong moment, so fix it and do something so that we don't have this conversation again. Ever." He was definitely pissed, and Jesse and Rachel were not about to fail at this.

After rehearsal they both decided to face the monster: they were discussing their seemingly terrible, fizzling chemistry over coffee, but neither of them could approach the subject. Jesse decided to take the bull by the horns.

"So, Rachel, let's talk about this, I know this is uncomfortable but we can't let this affect or performance."

"You're right, I've never felt so inadequate in my entire life, I was so ashamed! I can't believe I let this happen!"

"WE let this happen, it's both our faults! But to tell you the truth, I just feel kind of nervous…"

"I remember when I used to get nervous…" she quipped, effectively breaking the ice, since they were both laughing.

"I was a piece of work wasn't I?" he replied while rolling his eyes. "But Rachel, seriously, we need to work with this. I know it's hard due to our recent history… But we have to acknowledge this and move on."

"I'm all for moving on Jesse, but first I want to apologize, what I did was so wrong…"

"Don't, Rachel." Jesse interrupted her. "Don't apologize for something that I did, I'm the only one responsible for all of this Rachel, and I'm so sorry!"

She gave him a big smile.

"It's not necessary to go back there, Jesse. It's all in the past as far as I'm concerned, ancient history. I just feel so bad and so foolish for trying to seduce you like that! I'm really sorry, you know?" Now she was covering her eyes with her hands, and her cheeks were beet red.

Jesse also blushed at the not too distant memory, she definitely didn't know how good she was.

"Don't worry Rachel, I deserved much worse, it was nothing that several cold showers couldn't repair. But you were hot…"

She knew he was teasing her, and rolled her eyes.

"Come on, let's just put this behind us. We both messed up, let's really move on and be friends and good actors. But I do have a question that's been nagging me…"

"Uh-oh." Now he was looking at her dramatically concerned.

"Jesse! Come on, one last thing. It's something you said when we met at that café. You said something about a nail driving out another, and I've been raking my brains but I don't know what you mean!"

"Do you really want me to tell you, or should I simply take my stupid comment back?"

"Tell me."

"Before telling you, promise me you won't get mad at me. It was a stupid comment and I really want to put this all behind us Rachel."

"Promise."

"Okay. I was referring to Finn Hudson. I was so jealous of him, I couldn't understand why you were heads over heels for him, he was just so… I truly don't want to talk about this!"

"You were jealous of Finn?"

He didn't want to talk about it, but something about her incredulous demeanor made him continue.

"Very jealous. I didn't think you ever liked me as much as you liked him, and I know you guys started dating immediately after we broke up…"

"Liked him more? Of course I liked him more! He was there to pick up the pieces when you broke my heart, Jesse! I won't deny that I liked him, he was the only friend I had in glee back then, but I was in LOVE with you, and for the record, we didn't break up, YOU broke up with me!"

"Were you really in love with me? Because I was in love with you… " Now he was the incredulous one.

"So you say… You had quite a way to show your love back then… But it's okay, Jesse, I just wanted to know what you meant. I want us to start fresh, to be able to be friends. We needed to talk about it, and that's that."

"I guess we can be friends then." He offered his hand, which she shook, sealing the deal: they would be friends, or so they thought…

* * *

Rachel and Jesse were the only actors on stage with costumes, both wearing their respective tops, and he was making fun of her since she looked goth with her black ornate blouse and jeans. They spent some time before rehearsal getting to know each other's tops, and thankfully Rachel's was made of a zipper disguised by Velcro buttons.

As soon as they finished the song, they looked at each other and Rachel gave him an almost imperceptible smile, and put her hands at the sides of his face while he lowered his lips to her, their kiss growing deeper and more passionate as their tongues met and feverishly played with each other. They separated for an instant and looked deeply into each other's eyes while Jesse found her top button and lowered his mouth to her again, a wave of emotion overcoming them while they fumbled with the other's buttons. Once both their tops were off, Jesse gasped involuntarily when he saw Rachel's exposed breasts, which were nowhere close to green, her small nipples hard, and as he cupped one breast in his hand, the lowered her down with the other while hungrily kissing her again as the lights went off. They were still kissing when the lights went on again, and only noticed the fact that the scene had ended when the director started loudly clapping.

"Finally! I don't know what you guys did, and frankly, I don't want to know. But that is exactly what I was looking for. Keep it up!"

Rachel was grateful for the interruption, and she kept wondering how different it would all have been if it was someone else and not Jesse, because she was really kissing him, not Fiyero. She hadn't fully realized until that moment that she'd finally made it: she was in Broadway, living her dream, and she couldn't help but remember bittersweet memories of her time with Jesse back in high school, when he had promised her he would make all her dreams come true.

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Reviews still make my day!


	7. Chapter 7

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**Sorry that I couldn't upload this yesterday, but my dsl was down. The good news is that Ch 8 is almost finished, and things are getting very interesting! Enjoy! And to all of you readers who are also writers, please write something! We need more fics to keep St Berry alive!**

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Bells. Rachel heard the bells again. The first time she heard the bells was after she sang with Jesse for the first time in the music store, right after he asked her out. At first she thought that hearing bells was some kind of metaphor of heaven, since she felt that she had died and went to heaven after singing that duet with none other than the Jesse St James, star of Vocal Adrenaline. She could almost see a choir of angels ringing bells welcoming her: she was sure that was what heaven was all about. Then she realized it was probably bells on the main door, and quickly discarded her heaven theory.

But now she kept hearing those damned bells right after the forest scene. Only that she now associated the bells with some kind of purgatory, since hearing them meant that she had to stop kissing Jesse.

Sure, they were only friends now, and Rachel did her best to keep it that way, their lives were too complicated with the musical to concentrate on anything else. But at that time, when she and Jesse sang together and kissed, she let her feelings roam and allowed all that pent up passion to flow freely, only for the sake of drama, of course. She was convinced that it was natural to feel that way about a co-star, especially one that you had to kiss passionately almost every day. It was all part of acting, and she was a wonderful actor, after all.

Jesse did not hear the bells, he didn't even know about them, but at least he was honest enough to admit to himself that those kisses were not acting, he would never enjoy kissing someone as much as he did kissing her. Those kisses were definitely the highlight of his days, the only time he could somehow show her how he felt, now that they were just friends. He couldn't quite put his finger on what was it about Rachel that attracted him so much. Physically, he thought she looked great, but he was sure he'd been with more beautiful girls, tall, mysterious, dangerously underfed stunning girls. But there was something about Rachel, about those eyes, that nose, those lips, that hair, that blended together in perfect synchrony. Her body was normal, her legs were phenomenal: he'd had plenty of fantasies which included those legs, sometimes over his shoulders, around his waist… And talent aside, Rachel was definitely high maintenance and her Type-A personality shone through just by looking at her. But, strangely enough, he loved those all of those things, her little quirks, the way she talked, the way she moved, the whole package. In short: Jesse St James could have any girl he wanted, but he only wanted her, and loving her felt as natural as breathing.

* * *

Rachel was a little jealous, although she wouldn't even admit it to herself. Sure, she knew what jealousy was, Finn Hudson taught her that feeling well, but this was different. She and Jesse were just friends now. Just. Friends. And she needed a friend; she was used to spend most of her time with Mark, and between auditioning and strategizing for auditions, they were always together. He had a key to Rachel's apartment, and spent there more time than he did at his old place. But now that he was gone, she found herself spending more and more time with Jesse. Rehearsals were long and grueling, and the little time they would spend together, sometimes alone, but most of the time with Anna, the actor playing Glinda. Not only was she beautiful, but she was sweet and very funny, and it seems that everybody on the set loved her. She was fiercely talented, so much so that she didn't even need to act: acting and singing just came to her naturally. Anna was a goofball, and her laid back style was like a magnet, and you couldn't help but feel good around her. And the only thing keeping Rachel from feeling good around Anna was Jesse.

Opening night was approaching, and Rachel wished she was as relaxed and laid back as Anna. But the truth was that she was nervous and stressed out, and to top it all off she needed to find a new place to live in a week. Even though she tried to look positive and cheerful, Jesse noticed something was wrong with Rachel, she wasn't her usual talkative self.

He was looking at Anna's impressive music and video collection on her latest ipad, when he saw Rachel out of the corner of his eye looking at them.

She was eating an apple and listening to her ipod, and she couldn't help but look at them and feel something odd on the pit of her stomach. She saw him whisper something to Anna's ear and then signaling her, so she took off her headphones.

"Come here Rachel, you have to see this!"

When she got there, Jesse pointed to Anna's ipad, where Rachel could see a video of herself singing at the last nationals her old glee club had won. Rachel smiled while placing herself under Jesse's arm.

"Thank you, I really needed that…"

"What's wrong, sweetie?" Anna asked.

"Oh, nothing, I guess I'm a bit stressed since the big night is approaching, and on top of that I need to find a new place… This sucks…"

Jesse furrowed his brow and looked concerned.

"Why do you need to move now?"

"I got a letter yesterday about a mold infestation in the building, apparently some apartments are really bad, and even though my apartment is fine, the health department wants everyone out by next week. The worst part is that I have to leave everything and just take with me strictly personal stuff. My landlord's insurance will cover all the expenses, including relocation and the stuff that I must leave behind… I can't even take my pillows!" She almost cried after her last statement.

"That sucks for sure, honey, but you can stay with me! I have a small studio but I'm sure my flatmate won't mind at all, and we can get one of those air mattresses for you!"

"Oh, Anna, thank you, but I don't want to impose myself on you and your roommate, I'll just stay in a hotel until after opening night, and then my dads will help me find a new place…"

"But why don't you call them now, I'm sure they'll find you a new place in no time!"

"Yeah, I thought about that, but Jesse you know my dads, they'll be all over me, and I can't have that sort of pressure before the show starts!"

"I know, I know…" He stayed pensive for a while.

"Stay with me then! My apartment is quite comfortable, and I have an extra room that's practically empty! And it has a bed, with plenty of pillows, there's no need for an air mattress!"

"Thank you Jesse, but you know I can't…"

"Of course you can, Rachel, we already know each other well and we work together. Just think about it, right now I'm your only reasonable choice, unless you're already fond of the idea of the air mattress at Anna's place…"

Anna punched him playfully in the arm. "You're such an ass!"

Jesse laughed.

"Seriously, Rachel, stay with me, you can look for a new place later, when we get used to doing the show every night!"

She had to admit it wasn't a bad idea, she'd be even closer to the theater, and it was ten times better than spending a lot of money in some crappy hotel, plus she'd have some company, and even get to see him all the time… Of course that didn't matter, they were just friends now. Just Friends.

"Okay, okay, I'll do it. But I just want you to be completely sure about this. I don't want you to make a decision this monumental just because you feel sorry for me and I'm an old friend. After all, we're talking about sharing a bathroom, which I think is a highly personal and even sacred space in some instances…"

Rachel's little lecture was interrupted by a hand over her mouth, Jesse's hand, to be precise.

"Stop, it's done, you're staying with me. Wanna move tonight?"

She couldn't help but smile. "Thanks Jesse, let me gather my stuff tonight, can we do it tomorrow?"

He responded with a hug. "Whenever, roomie. You tell me when. Do you by any chance have one of those espresso machines? I've been dying to get one…"

And that's how Rachel and Jesse became roommates.

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**Reviews are love...**


	8. Chapter 8

**Enjoy!****CHAPTER 8**

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Jesse looked like an idiot, or at least he did in Anna's opinion. "A cute idiotic face", to be more precise.

"God, Jesse, how can you be so damn happy right now, just two weeks before opening night? You and your pretty teeth are getting on my nerves! You definitely have the hots for her, you should look at yourself!"

He didn't answer, his grin growing wider. Anna was wrong, he was not just happy, he felt blissful, he hadn't felt that good in ages. Rachel was moving in with him. He had lied, of course, since his spare room just had a bed, not a single pillows or even sheets, but thanks to the fact that they were living in the city that never sleeps, finding all those things, plus extra towels was not a problem. He also filled his fridge with fruits and vegetables and vegan food, and had his apartment cleaned. He even brought her flowers, he didn't know which ones she liked, so he got her nice smelling roses and put them on a vase in her room. A spare key was waiting for her on top of what would become her new dresser. He wanted her to love his apartment, maybe it would make her stay.

She was still moping at rehearsals.

"So, are you ready for the big move?" She still wasn't sure that moving with Jesse was a great idea. Her dads were not too happy when she told them about him being a co-star, but Shelby had helped a little, she was absolutely delighted that they had found each other once again.

"I guess, there's not much I can actually take with me, I had to fight for the right over my teddy bear…"

"What about your clothes, can you take them?" Not that he would mind having her walk around naked around his apartment.

"Well, they want us to leave behind as much as we can, since they believe everything could be contaminated… They're encouraging us to take only what we can wash with bleach, which is almost nothing… But I'll stop complaining now, I saw an apartment on my floor and it was awful, I couldn't believe it could get that bad!"

He loved how she was able to lift herself up from whatever funk she was in.

After rehearsals, he went with her to her apartment to pick up her belongings, which were not many, just a big suitcase, and 4 boxes. Her apartment was fine, but the hallways and even the elevator smelled awful, stale and moldy.

On the cab ride to Jesse's apartment, Rachel kept talking about how her dads would help her get a new place soon after opening night. She hadn't told them yet to avoid the Berry family drama, but she would have to inform them once they got to NY. But once they got to Jesse's place, she was sure she wanted to stay. Her room was big and smelled like roses, and there were towels on her bed, magazines and two bottles of Evian water on the nightstand.

"My cleaning lady is a Martha Stewart fan! She got the Evian, the magazines and the food, I got the flowers, I hope you like them!"

"I love them Jesse! This room is much nicer to the one I had, it reminds me of my room back home!" Which is exactly what Jesse wanted.

"We'll have to share the bathroom, though…"

She just smiled at him. "Thank you, Jesse, you don't know how much this means to me…"

"It's nothing, Rach, anything to keep you from Anna's tiny and already crowded apartment!"

She felt a jealousy pang in her stomach. "You've been there?"

"Oh yeah, she lives on top of one of the best Thai restaurants, I have to take you there, everything's delicious."

Rachel felt her heart sink a little.

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Jesse and Rachel didn't spend much time at the apartment the next two weeks after she moved, for they were constantly rehearsing for opening night. They had gotten so comfortable around one another that anyone could think they were a couple instead of just friends. As opening night approached, they were both starting to get nervous, especially Rachel. They got to the apartment very late the night before the opening, and Jesse fixed Rachel a bath with some lavender that Anna had given him. They talked a little before going to bed, and even though Rachel had some chamomile tea, she could not sleep.

"Are you asleep?" Rachel was standing outside his room, even though he had left the door open.

"No, come in" he said while patting the spot beside him on the bed.

"I'm so worried, Jesse, what if I forget all my lines? I've heard of actors that went completely blank on stage after having successfully rehearsed for months, I'm afraid to let everyone down, my dads and Shelby are going to be there…" her face was now between her hands, which Jesse took in his.

"Rach, look at me. Don't get all drama queen on me now, you know you're going to be absolutely amazing." She was looking at him with her big wet brown eyes. He arched his eyebrows. "Tell me, Rachel, who are those actors that forgot all of their lines?"

"You wouldn't know who they are, they are the unknowns, they never made it and now the probably live under a bridge destined for perennial destitution because they could never recover from the shame of messing up their lines on their first opening night…"

Jesse was amusedly smiling at her, and she had to admit that her own story was so improbable and ridiculous that she had to smile back at him.

"I'm just a nervous wreck… But I feel better now, just talking to you" she was yawning then.

"Well, stay here, I'm a little bit nervous too and your presence is kind of soothing" Rachel found a nook under his shoulder and just positioned herself there, his arm serving as a pillow while he played with her hair. She found herself suddenly very tired and drifted to sleep fast, feeling safe by Jesse's side.

Jesse also fell asleep with Rachel in his arms, and slept better than he had in his entire life.

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Rachel woke up rested and content, she was still in Jesse's arms, and he could hear him snoring lightly behind her as she nestled her back further into him, until she felt something hard poking the small of her back. Something big and hard. She unconsciously pushed back a little, suddenly very aroused. He moved even closer to her and put his arm on her hip, holding her close, but she could tell he was still asleep since she could hear the pattern of his slow breathing unchanged. A part of her wanted to slide down her underwear right there, she was so wet already. Jesse pushed himself against her and moaned something like "mmmmm" still in his sleep.

"Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up" was all she could think, she just wanted him to wake up and take her right then and there from behind. She grinded her ass even further into him, but he was still profoundly asleep, and she suddenly realized it was opening day, and they had to get up and get ready for their big event.

She quietly got up from bed and went into the bathroom, filling the tub with hot water and a little leftover lavender while brushing her teeth. She was very excited about the day, and very disappointed at the same time, she had to admit to herself that she wanted him badly, and that those daily kisses at rehearsal were simply not enough anymore. The water was nice and calmed her a little, but she was still thinking about her close encounter a few minutes back as she slid a hand between her legs. She could still feel her wetness under the water, which made her instinctively stroke herself, and she closed her eyes and put her head back as she rubbed herself faster until she felt her orgasm quickly approaching.

"Oh Jesse, yes, yes, oh yes Jesse, ohhh…"

She just stayed there with her hand still between her legs and a big smile on her face for a while, enjoying the hot water and a happy post orgasmic daze while she thought about their big night.

Jesse was standing by the door afraid to even breath. He had gotten up with na bigger than usual boner to an empty bed and went half asleep to the toilet when he saw her on the tub. Naked. Touching herself. At first he was going to turn around, but how could he leave the mirage before his eyes… It took all of his will and common sense to keep himself from getting into the tub with her and fuck her brains out. He just couldn't move, growing harder by the second, until the impossible happened: she called his name. Naked Rachel called his name while touching herself. Twice. Jesse's hand travelled immediately to his shorts and he came with just two strokes, and before he could even enjoy his own orgasm he realized the delicate situation he was in: he was invading her privacy with his hand under his pants. Her eyes were still closed, so he retreated quietly into his room. After changing his shorts and cleaning his hand, he went back into the bathroom, this time knocking softly before entering.

"Rachel, are you in there?"

"Yes, but I'm already done, gimme a second! Aren't you excited for tonight?"

"Very excited! And don't worry, take your time, I'll just start the coffee!" He just smiled a big smile as he walked into the kitchen, things were definitely (and literatlly) looking up.

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**Could anyone please explain to me why they are talking about winning Nationals on Glee, and not Sectionals? I thought they did not qualify, I'm confused!**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please review, they still make my day!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I wanted to thank you all for your awesome reviews! **

**And for those of you who read my previous story, I forgot to mention that Jesse's character is based on a Mexican singer who's incredibly hot and apparently is a pretentious asshole, but has the most beautiful voice. Check him out in youtube, his name is Luis Miguel.**

**The last scene of this chapter is for fromthebrain, who specifically requested some serious action! ; )**

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LOVE. Pure, unconditional love, is what Rachel felt for Jesse at the end of their first show, standing beside him, holding hands, while receiving their first official Broadway standing ovation. There was no doubt in her mind now, Jesse was the one. She had never felt so much love for anyone before, the kind of love that fills your heart and your soul with conviction, passion and peace.

She had the first clue of her revelation early that morning, when she woke up in his arms. Sure, they'd kissed and made out before, but they'd never had sex, and she knew she was ready for him, she felt it deep inside, a feeling of certainty she had never felt before.

Then the way he'd been acting around her also gave her another clue: he was going out of his way just to please her and make sure she was well and comfortable.

The third clue came just before the show started, she was very nervous, but Jesse held her for a long time until she was calm, and then kissed her tenderly on the lips before wishing her the mandatory "Break a leg". Finally, she saw him looking at her while she was singing "Defying Gravity", and the look on his face could only be describe as adoring. She felt a connection with him that could not, and would not be denied any longer: this was real, Jesse St James was the love of her life.

Having him beside her while receiving what seemed as a never ending round of applause, was the ultimate high, and he was looking at her like he also knew, as if he'd also had a revelation.

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After the curtains fell for the last time of the night, Jesse pulled Rachel into his arms and held her tightly while whispering "We made it, baby, we made it" to her ear. Tears of happiness were welling in her eyes as he looked at her in the eyes while stroking her cheeks with his thumbs. He kissed her again, first tenderly, and then more passionately, and then they were interrupted by the hugs of their cast mates. Most were crying out of sheer happiness. But then she saw Jesse also kissing Anna on the lips. Sure, there just 2 or 3 short kisses, but they were enough to punch her in the stomach, the image of the newly revealed love of her life kissing another girl, a very pretty, sweet and incredibly talented girl. Then she lost him among the crowd, and as everyone was heading to the dressing rooms she caught a glimpse of him still by Anna's side.

When she saw her daddies, she forgot about the punch in her stomach for a while, and was on top of the world again as her dads and later a procession of friends and family hugged and kissed her and showered her with compliments and love: Shelby, Mr. Shuester, Mercedes, Kurt, and Tina, and a few professors from Tisch. She hadn't seen anyone from her old glee club in years even though she had maintained some sort of communication with them through Facebook, but she was thrilled to see them , she saw her best friend Mark and she ran to him and he caught her and spun her around like Cinderella. After kissing and hugging him she punched him.

"What are you doing here? You said you couldn't come!"

"Of course I had to surprise you! And you were so incredibly amazing up there, peanut."

"I never thought it would feel this good! I'm so happy you're here, we have so much to talk about, we haven't talked in ages!"

"Three weeks to be exact, Rachel, I didn't want to bother you right before the show! But it's been a while, I want to know everything about what you're doing and about St James, who looks way hotter now than the first time I saw him."

The mere mention of his name made Rachel look intuitively for him, and she saw him still standing next to Anna, he motioned her to go over where he was. Rachel complied, with a heavy heart, since she did not understand Anna's presence, didn't she have any family or friends to be around?

As soon as she got near him, he put his arm around her.

"Mom, Dad, this is THE famous Rachel Berry!" Jesse's mom was a beautiful woman, with dark hair and the bluest eyes Rachel had ever seen, and a sincere welcoming smile. And his dad was incredibly more handsome than his beautiful son, Rachel had never seen such a good looking older man.

His mom pulled Rachel into an embrace.

"I'm so glad to finally meet you, my god, look at you, you're gorgeous!"

Rachel replied a shy "Thank you", before Jesse interrupted the moment.

"Well, if you think she's gorgeous now with green skin, I hope you're not too disappointed when you see her without makeup!"

"Oh my, I've been hugging and kissing everyone with this green skin! I need to get this off or I'll never make it to the party!" The cast and crew were having a big party on a nearby restaurant.

After excusing herself, she made it to her dressing room, and was surprised to find Kathy, her makeup artist waiting for her there, as well as Anna, who had already changed and looked fabulous even with her still coiffed hair.

"T'was about time girl, let's start taking off that green if we wanna make it tonight!"

The two girls started removing Rachel's body makeup, while she removed it from her face. Thirty five minutes later they were done, and Rachel changed into a blue blouse with black tight pants.

Jesse was waiting for them and he escorted them to the party, where all of their friends and family were waiting. Rachel and Jesse barely spoke to one another while there, they were busy with their respective friends, but they kept looking at each other, and she felt like he was undressing her with his eyes every time he looked at her. Rachel's glass of wine seemed to be bottomless: every time she took a sip it someone filled it up again. And being reminded of her earlier revelation by Jesse's lustful looks, she felt herself fill with warm moisture, her inhibitions peeling away. She wanted him badly.

Even though she was supposed to stay with her dads at their hotel room, she told them that she forgot her bag at the apartment and swore she would stay with them the next night. Figuring she was tired, they let her go easily, they still didn't know she was living in Jesse's place.

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She left with Jesse. He just stood by her side and asked her if she was ready, and when she nodded he took her outside and hailed a cab. They just sat in the cab looking at each other with their fingers entwined.

Jesse opened the door and let Rachel walk in first, and as soon as the door was closed he pinned her to it and started placing kisses on the side of her face and her neck. She managed to escape from his grip, and took him by the hand to the sofa, which was on the side of one of the floor to ceiling windows. The apartment was dark, the only illumination streaming in was courtesy of the city's night lights.

As they stood in front of the sofa, Rachel took off her blouse, never taking her eyes off Jesse. He was so shocked by her actions that he could barely move, afraid that his pants would burst if he did. She took off her shoes and her pants, standing there in front of him with just her underwear. Black, lacy, transparent underwear. Jesse thought he may actually be drooling.

Then she proceeded to take off his shirt, again never taking her eyes off his; he was speechless, and just let her do whatever she wanted. She touched his chest with her hands, her fingers trailing to the top of his pants, which she started unbuttoning. It was as if she had put a spell on him, he could not take his eyes off her. He felt her take off his pants along with her boxers, and for a moment she took her eyes off his and knelt in front of him to completely take off the pants. Jesse pushed his head back when he felt her warm breath over him. Rachel just looked at his length as if she had just unwrapped the most precious Christmas gift. She didn't dare touch him, she just looked at it. "You're such a beautiful, beautiful man, Jesse…" she said to herself. She stood in front of him and gently pushed him towards the couch. She then gave him a condom.

"I think you're going to need this…"

As he sat stark naked fumbling nervously with the condom and looking at her, she took of her bra, and panties and she positioned herself on top of him, and balancing on her knees she lowered herself into him with a loud moan, still looking at his eyes.

"I want you Jesse. I need you…" She was very wet, and feeling Jesse inside of her was a sensation she did not want to forget.

"I want you too. I've wanted you for so long…"

Having awoken from her spell by the sensation of being inside of her, he took her by the hips as she started moving up and down on top of him, lowering her face to finally kiss him. They kissed hungrily, almost devouring each other as their rhythm increased and she pulled apart, lifting her head up as her moans grew louder. Jesse couldn't believe when she lowered her hand to touch herself as she was nearing an orgasm, the reminder of watching her on the tub was more than he could take and he exploded inside of her, with her following him almost immediately. She collapsed on top of him and he just held her, and after a while she pulled back a little and looked at him, he was smiling at her. She smiled back.

"Jesse, I don't think I can get up, I'm so tired…"

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it"

He placed a small kiss on her lips and stood up, carrying her in his arms.

There in his arms, Rachel felt the same high she had felt right after the show, she felt again on top of the world. But there is something about simple physics that cannot be denied: the higher you are, the harder you fall, and Rachel was about to find how hard she could hit the ground.

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**Reviews, please? Feel free to point out any typos or give any crtitique that may make this better! Make my day, please?**


	10. Chapter 10

**First of all, thanks to all of you who take a minute of your time to review. I see reviews as fuel, the more I get, the faster I want to update. I admit that I was little sad since I got so little reviews for the last chapter, especially since a lot of you have this story on your alerts. After reading a few awesome stories I thought mine really sucked, but after a while I realized they're not that bad. In other words, please review if you like a story, any story! Sorry for the rant, must be the PMS talking… : P Enjoy!**

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Mornings were Rachel's favorite time of the day. She liked getting up very early, sprinting out of bed before no one else was up, and she savored those precious minutes when her mind was clear, and she just needed to think about executing the plans usually made the night before. She usually exercised on her elliptical, but when the weather was good or at least tolerable, she preferred walking briskly outside. Mornings always found Rachel at her best, brimming with confidence, optimism and enough energy to light up a small city. But then again, Rachel was used to wake up by herself.

The morning after the opening night Rachel slept late. She opened her eyes early, like a toddler she was conditioned to wake up at the same time every day, no matter how late she went to sleep. But upon opening her eyes she was treated to one of the most beautiful sights she'd ever seen in her 20 years: the sleeping form of Jesse St James. He was facing her, his eyes closed. His mouth was slightly open, his breathing calm and slow. She wanted him to open his eyes, his perfect, intense, passionate eyes. The color of his eyes changed constantly, and Rachel had learned to read his moods by the color of his eyes. She knew a strom was brewing when they were dark green, like the day he smashed an egg to her forehead. She rarely saw that color again, except for the time when they were admonished for their apparent lack of chemistry. Light blue-green was her favorite color, it meant that he was happy and generally in good spirits. The same shade turned darker whenever he was tired or very concentrated, that was the color she usually saw in his eyes whenever they kissed on-stage. To top it all, his stunning eyes were framed by a smooth curtain of long lashes, which almost brushed his cheeks as he slept.

She couldn't resist touching his face, so she ran a hand ever so softly through his hair, her thumb gently caressing the side of his face. The throb of emotions inside her chest were too much and forced her to close her eyes, her usual morning clarity obscured by the wild thumping of her heart, she had never felt that much. She opened her eyes when she felt Jesse moving closer to her, his own hand mimicking her actions, and for the first time she could not decipher the look in his eyes. She felt her breath becoming heavier as his hand travelled to her back to pull her close to him. They stayed looking at each other for a long time, their hands gently caressing each other, words unnecessary.

Jesse knew he was in trouble even before he opened his eyes, the second he felt her hand in his hair. He could not help but move closer to Rachel, his passion growing every time she narrowed her brown eyes as he touched her. It was the first time he felt the way he did at that moment, his love for her augmented every second, it felt almost dangerous.

After what seemed like hours of silently looking at each other's eyes, Jesse pulled Rachel even closer as his lips descended onto hers. Their kiss started gentle, lips softly touching, becoming more urgent as their bodies sought each other, and their hands busied themselves on each other's naked skin. He positioned himself on top of her, taking his time to relish the unique feeling of sliding into her, her insides tight and warm and moist. Jesse had had sex many times before, he'd slept with most of the girls in Vocal Adrenaline at one time or another during high school, he'd even lost his virginity to one of them when he was barely fifteen. He also had his share of nameless, faceless girls during college, he never saw any of them in the morning: he made sure to leave right after sex, for that was all it was, just sex. Rachel was different; she embodied all he didn't even know he wanted. The sex they'd had last night had been wonderful, but it was done in haste, their bodies crashing onto each other in desperate desire. But this time he was taking all the time in the world to make sure Rachel would never forget the first time he made love to her.

* * *

Rachel was still astounded, her head still light and dizzy from their love making, Jesse had just shown her a whole new meaning to the word 'pleasure'. Unfortunately, she was shaken off her reverie by her cell phone. She debated whether she should answer, or join Jesse in the shower. The second prospect was winning until she saw that it was one of her dads.

"Morning sunshine!" both dads sang in unison as she smiled, she thought she had the best parents, and she could never understand why so many people barely tolerated their own parents.

From there on her dads alternated on the phone, she could almost see them fighting over the rights to talk to her.

"Shelby told us about the apartment situation, we know you're staying at Jesse's. Don't worry, we'll find you a new place soon."

They were so casual about it Rachel almost admitted that she was talking to them from his bed. Still naked. Thinking about moving from Jesse's apartment deflated her a little bit.

"Have you seen the papers? There are reviews in all of them, but we're waiting to be with ypou so that we can read them aloud! The waiting is killing us, but the headlines look very promising!"

It was the first time the thought came to her head, this was a make or break moment, what she had been waiting for her whole life.

"Oh my god the papers, Jesse, there are reviews already on the papers! Hurry, we need to go! Daddy, we'll meet you at your hotel. Do not read anything until I'm there! Jesse, let's go!" she shouted while hanging up her phone.

"Do you have the papers?" shouted Jesse back, and she decided she would not waste her precious voice shouting, so she joined him on the shower.

"Jesse, we need to go, do you know what this means?"

Frantic Rachel had walked on his shower and had stolen his water, she was now washing her head as she kept talking about the reviews. Jesse felt warm inside, he could picture being like this with her forever. Rachel saw something else in his eyes.

"Oh no, you're not. We're not. We have to go Jesse, but I promise I'll make it up to you later" she said playfully.

"I'll make sure you deliver your promise, I'm taking it very seriously…"

Rachel put her right hand on her chest and lifted the other.

"I promise"

Jesse had to at least kiss her after that, and she felt her insides melting once again.

"Jesse, please…."

He reluctantly let her go.

"Okay, okay, you win, but you owe me…"

They got dressed and left his apartment on a hurry, he didn't even question where he was going, he just wanted to be with her. Their cell phones were exploding with calls, apparently everyone either had very good or very bad news. But they were together now, and as long as they were together, they could face anything.

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**Only two more chapters after this one! Make me update soon, please review if you liked it!**


	11. Chapter 11

**This is what happens when I get nice reviews, I update fast! Thank you so much for all of your reviews, I'm tired of saying that your reviews make my day, but the really do! I'm updating two chapters at once, the first one quite short, but it needed to stand alone. And to all of you who didn't want the story to end, please know that I'll**** need at least 3 more chapters to finish! So enjoy!**

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Love happens. It can sometimes surprise us at first sight, but most of the time, the reality of actually being in love does not manifest itself until later, in retrospection.

Rachel didn't know she was IN love with Jesse until the opening night of their show. Looking back, she could pinpoint the exact moment she knew to that night. She just knew. She thought she had been in love many times before, but now she recognized that She had been in love with Jesse all along.

Back in high school, Rachel was so preoccupied with her dreams of becoming a star that she didn't think twice about a boy. She did not focus too much on the physical aspect, the boy she would fall in love with had to be her equal in talent and aspirations. That was until she heard Finn Hudson, the jock she never even knew existed. She had to admit that he was nowhere near her level of talent or aspirations, but the boy had some talent, and he looked so good… It was the first time Rachel felt something for a member of the opposite sex. A boy. And somehow, the fact that he was unavailable and not too interested in her fueled her fire to the point where she didn't care that much that his girlfriend was pregnant. She thought she was in love with him later, when they officially became an item and he was starting to work on his talent, until he left her to follow his aspirations, which did not include her.

Then she met Jesse St James, and she knew she was in love the moment his cockiness disappeared when he sang the first notes of Hello. Finally, she had met a boy that was her equal in talent and aspirations, and he was incredibly handsome, to top it off. Of course, he had an agenda, and he ended up breaking her heart terribly, so what she thought was love turned to spitefulness, love could not hurt so bad. Thankfully Finn was there to pick up the pieces of her broken heart. He did a fine job, and she thought she was in love with him again, until she had to leave for college, when she realized that her aspirations did not include him.

She dated a few guys in college, but none of them felt like love. The closest thing she had to love was her best friend Mark, and she was content with just that until she saw Jesse again, and all the feelings for him that she thought were dead returned with a vengeance. In retrospect she knew that she was in love with Jesse all along, since the day she met him, but it wasn't until that night that she realized he was all she ever wanted.

On the other hand, love was a word that eluded Jesse's acuity for a long time. He tried to understand it, but ultimately thought people in love were just fools wasting their time and energy. Sex alone sufficed any need he could have for a girl, and that was that. Outside of his family, Jesse only knew how to love himself. Until he met her. The first time he saw Rachel Berry was during sectionals, when she revived a bored audience with her powerful voice, he really liked her. He could not conceive how the most potent and beautiful voice he'd ever heard came out of such a small and delicate body. He had no problem when Shelby came to him with her little plan to befriend her: he would go farther and seduce her. He never thought seducing her would be so easy and so incredibly hard at the same time, and it was because he didn't know back then he had fallen in love with her. When he left her he was miserable, and sex was not just sex anymore, most of the time it was accompanied by thoughts of her. He realized he was in love with Rachel the day he met her at that café, and gave her his number hoping that she would call. He spent an entire week looking at the bars on his phone, making sure it was properly working, he even called himself from a public phone. But then she called him, he asked her out, and she and managed to break his heart in just one night. He actually thanked God when he saw her again, and realized it was her all along, that she was his soulmate, the love of his life. He knew he had some karma to pay before she would forgive him completely, but he was willing to wait. He was certain that some day she would realize they belonged together.

Love happens, and when it does, it can become a paramount of bliss or a pit of misery. And unfortunately, it can sometimes be difficult to experience one without the other, for they often go hand in hand.


	12. Chapter 12

Rachel is perfect. I can't stop looking at her, at the combination of factors that fuse to make perfection. I know saying someone's perfect might be considered an exaggeration, but she truly is perfect. Perfect for me, anyway.

Perfection as in what artists ache for when they play with light and shadow; perfection is what a poet strives to describe in words, perfection is the grandest symphony a great composer endeavors the most. And perfection was mine.

We were on the cab on the way to her dad's hotel, my parents had to leave late last night so I'm free to go wherever I want, which is wherever she wants to go. She looks luminous today, as if she had somehow swallowed light and now it shone from within, making her glow. I'm trying my hardest no to grin like an imbecile, I've worked hard to maintain a certain level of coolness and I'm not about to lose it, but I guess being an idiot for a day won't do much harm to my image. I'm in love. Waking next to Rachel, admiring her perfection and then making love to her should be bookmarked as one of the highlights of my existence, along with the experience of living my dream in Broadway next to perfection. My life is perfect, this moment is perfect, I want to hold it captive in my mind. And as much as I'm happy, I'm scared witless of losing her, of losing this.

I know that I must act now, since the rest of the day was to be spent with her dads, and Shelby, and the guys from Lima. She's smiles at me as I lean down to kiss her, and she deepens the kiss and we end up making out in the cab in spite of the driver, who coarsely coughs to signal the impending arrival to our destination. She straightens up the top of her dress, as I comb my hair with my fingers. She cleans up the lipstick that has smeared around her lips and kisses me quickly before reapplying fresh lipstick, the sight of it along with our previous make up session enough to show through my pants. Thankfully, the producer of the show had provided my with some kind of wonder undergarments that were as perfect for our love scenes as well as for the meet and greet with the parents of your girlfriend who you just spent hours making love to, getting to know and savor every curve and crevice of her body. She smiles at me as she is wiping her lipstick from my own lips, and we get off the cab. I see the look in her eyes when I try to hold her hand and I understand, so I just put my hand on the small of her back as we enter the hotel.

Her dads and Shelby, the people from Lima and her friend Mark are all waiting for us at the hotel bar, they have ordered champagne, since the ceremonial act of reading the reviews for their little girl's performance had to become a new family and friends celebration, a very Berry tradition that I was grateful to partake of today.

Her face is beaming as the reviews start pouring in. Her performance was described in terms of "powerhouse", "brilliant", "dazzling", and "amazing". My facial muscles are starting to hurt from smiling so much, but I can't help myself. The reviews have been kind for me too, and all of them mention the amazing chemistry between the actors playing Elphaba and Fiyero, one of them went as far as to say "…their voices blend in perfect synchrony", "….the characters molded into one another and became one, a feat not easy to achieve before a live audience". The chemistry between Anna and Rachel had also been highlighted- "…it's not often that one has the pleasure to see actors bringing out the best in one another". There was not a single negative review, unless Rachel's dads decided not to show it, which was a big possibility. Everybody was so happy for us, but I was mainly happy for her, I guess this is what fools in love feel like, but I don't care, I've never felt this alive. I turn on my phone after a while, and immediately I get a call from Anna. I decide to push the ignore button, after all, I just wanted to be with Rachel. But after a while I see Anna coming through the doors with Kathy, her roommate and Rachel's makeup artist. She is also beaming as the people there recognize her and congratulate her effusively. Rachel went straight to her once she saw her there.

"Anna, you made it! Are the rest coming?"

"They better come, I hope they get here soon!"

She and Rachel held for a long time, and I'm glad Rachel is starting to open up to her, I know Anna had been trying to get close to her, but Rachel was being a bit difficult, cordial but not effusively friendly, like Anna was.

"Jesus jumping Jesse St James!" (Anna loves to call me that) "Why didn't you answer your phone? You must have a thousand messages from me! Thank goodness Rachel answered! Everyone's coming!"

Rachel is distracted by her friend Mark, and I finally get to hold Anna, I'm also happy for her, for all of us. She always kisses me on the lips, something I could not understand until I saw her doing it to everyone else. French and Italians kissed you in both cheeks, Anna went straight to the lips. After talking to Anna and Kathy for a while, I look for Rachel until my eyes find her and I see a tiny speck of sadness in them, so fleeting that only I could have noticed. She stands next to me and I put my arm tightly over her shoulders, kissing the side of her face and the top her head. I can feel her hand on my back under my jacket, her fingers slowly caressing me. Anna is smiling at us, she's been pestering me ever since she met Rachel, wanting me to admit my love for Rachel and do something about it.

What was supposed to be brunch with her parents exploded into a full fledge party, everyone drinking champagne and celebrating, even the director made it there.

"I need to use the restroom"

"I'll go with you."

As I escorted Rachel to the restroom we could see a small crowd had gathered to check out our cheerful soiree, and again I put my arm over her shoulders. This was perfect. I went to the men's bathroom and then waited for Rachel outside the ladies' room. She came out and discreetly pulled me in, making sure no one was around to see us. The ladies' room had independent stalls, completely covered and with a full door. She pulled me into one, and whispered "Miss me" to my ear.

I lean down to kiss her, our kisses turning frantic as she unbuttons my pants and I lift her dress, she pushes her underwear to the side and grabs me to guide me inside of her. She is against the wall, and our moans are stifled by our kisses. I thrust into her desperately, her breath becomes faster and her moans louder as she goes over the edge, and I feel her pulsating around me, the look of lust and pleasure in her face enough to make me follow her. We stayed there after a while, our breaths becoming more even as her head rests on my chest. I feel empty when I slip out of her, I want to stay inside of her forever. She smiles at me as she once again straightens her dress, reapplies lipstick and wipes my face. She leaves me in there until she makes sure the room is empty and I quickly exit and head to the men's room to gather myself before going back to the party. She leaves first by herself, turning to smile at me as she struts and is met by the Asian girl from Lima whose name I can't recall. Once inside, I smile at my refection on the mirror as I adjust my clothes after our impromptu session, wondering how could I ever be so lucky to have her, she is amazing. She is perfect. My life is perfect.

I see Rachel when I walk back to the party, she is still talking to the Asian girl, who is smiling at me.

"Remember Tina?"

"Of course Tina! I'm so glad you guys made it"

We're interrupted by a middle aged lady and her husband, looking at me and then at Rachel.

"Oh my God. Are you Fiyero?"

I smile at her.

"Oh dear, you are Elphaba" she tells Rachel, "I recognize your pretty face even if it isn't green! You guys were amazing! The best show I've ever been! Honey, the camera! Mind if I take my picture with you?"

"Sure!" quipped Rachel happily. After the husband took several pictures, the small crowd gathering outside the lobby bar was now around us, asking questions and taking pictures. It was surreal that people recognized us after just one night, amazing and scary. I didn't have to talk much, Rachel did all the talking. She was happy, after all this is what we wanted the most, to be stars, to be famous…

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**Ok, if you're nice and review, I'll update tomorrow again! I'm on a roll! Next chapter will be in Rachel's POV.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thank you all for your reviews, you are all way too nice! : )**

**This was going to be a loooong chapter, but I decided to post them separately. I did very long chapters in "La Vita e Bella", and even I got bored reading them : p**

**Two more chapters after this...**

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Rachel Berry had never been happier in her life. Or more miserable.

She was only 20 years old and she had achieved her Broadway dream; she was the star of the latest hot ticket show and the reviews for her performance had been outstanding. And best of all, she had been able to take Brodway by storm with Jesse St James, the only person in the world who understood her completely and shared both her talent, passion and ambition. And he loved her. She was sure he loved her, even though neither of them had said it out loud. She loved him. But Rachel had never been so scared, she was absolutely terrified.

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The day after the opening had been magical for Rachel, making love to Jesse and celebrating along with her family and friends the great reviews, and making love to Jesse again. They just couldn't get enough of each other. Jesse had been wonderful to her, she had never felt so many emotions, sometimes it felt like her chest would burst. And lately also her head.

The honeymoon only lasted for a week. A blissful, careless week.

During their blissful week, they were together most of the time, even though no one in the theater knew about their relationship. They wanted to keep it to themselves to avoid the drama that would ensue once their co-stars knew, so they acted on their love once they got home, and they made sure to go home fast after they left the theater. They didn't talk about their feelings, they just acted upon them.

Then Rachel started thinking and thinking, and too much thinking is a terrible thing for drama queens with Type A personalities.

First, Rachel started thinking about her age. She was only 20, for crying out loud, her whole life was ahead of her. And yet here she was, already living with Jesse. This was a big step, and she felt like they had simply bypassed it completely, something felt off. Maybe they needed to talk, but Rachel could not bring herself to even say to him "we need to talk".

Then, there was Anna. Rachel was conflicted about Anna, she did not know what to think of her. She was incredibly nice to Rachel, and she went out of her way if she needed anything, but she also went out of her way for Jesse. A lot. She always kissed him on the lips, which bothered Rachel a great deal, she didn't even have to kiss him in the first place. And the way Anna acted around Jesse made Rachel cringe, the whispered words to his ear, how they laughed together, as if they were accomplices, partners in crime.

Of course, neither Jesse nor Anna had a clue of the storm brewing on Rachel's mind, after all, she had mastered her showface to the point where even she believed it herself. So Rachel ended up both loving AND hating Anna at the same time. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but she sensed that she and Jesse were harboring a secret and that she wasn't welcome in it. It seemed that whenever Anna and Jesse were talking amongst themselves and Rachel joined them, looks were exchanged and the subject suddenly changed very subtly, but Rachel knew that it was because of her. Other than that, Anna proved to be a great friend to Rachel, and it was only the interaction between her and Jesse that infuriated her. She was jealous, but she thought what she felt was something else, she had never felt that way before, not even with Finn: this was monumental.

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The show was thriving, and unwillingly the three of them had become instant celebrities. There were always fans at the stage door, and Rachel loved it. Even though Rachel was the last one to finish undressing because of her green makeup, Anna always exited after she and Jesse, and they ended up together signing autographs and having their pictures taken with fans. So when Anna suggested getting drinks from a nearby pub, she remembered how she was only 20 once they were at the door. Fortunately for them, the doorman recognized her and let them in. Rachel was beyond embarrassed, here she was, old enough to have sex and live with a man and be the star of a hit show, but not old enough to have a beer in a pub.

Anna started the rounds of shots, and Rachel downed them without a hitch.

"Rach, are you ok?" a concerned Jesse asked.

"Do I look like I'm not okay?"

"Well, to tell you the truth, you've been acting strangely these days, as if something was bothering you, and you were afraid to tell me…"

"I'm not afraid of anything Jesse. I'm not afraid of you, or Anna or anyone. Bring on the lions, I'm not afraid of them either!". She was drunk.

"Let's go back home, you shouldn't keep drinking, we have a long day tomorrow and…"

"Home? Which home, Jesse? Do we have a home? Aren't we a little young to play home? I think I am, I'm too fucking young, that's my problem." She was drunk AND cursing. Now Jesse knew he was in trouble. Still, she got up.

"Let's go home or to your apartment or wherever."

Anna was talking to Rachel's makeup artist Kathy and another crew member, and Jesse pleaded silently that she would not interrupt their exit, and with one look she undersootd. Rachel was not feeling good and Jesse needed to take her home.

Rachel was serious on the cab ride, sitting with her arms crossed tightly across her chest, and staring at the back of the head of the driver. She waited in silence for Jesse to open the doors, and then stormed into the bathroom and shut the door closed as she collapsed on the floor crying. She tried to keep it down, but Jesse could hear her muted sobs through the door, and it broke his heart.

Rachel kept thinking, but if it was bad that a drama queen thought too much about anything, a drunk drama queen was much more dangerous. She was so confused, not knowing what she wanted anymore. She was sure she wanted Jesse, but it was getting too intense for her, she was too close too the fire and was starting to feel the burn. She did not want to end up consumed by it, to be strangled by the same ties that bonded her so strongly to Jesse. She just couldn't deal with it.

Jesse felt the door open, and he got in to find her in the tub, with the water running and looking suddenly sober and incredibly sad, with her knees pulled to the chest and her arms around it. Without a word he stood behind her and started washing her, as if she was a child. When he felt that she had relaxed a little, he started washing her hair, and he was carefully lathering abd massaging her head when he saw it, a sinlge tear rolling down her cheek. His own eyes teared up at the sight: he just knew.

After bathing her, he put her to bed and just laid beside her holding her, it could be the last time he could have her like this.

When she got up the next morning he had already made coffee and handed her the paper. Neither of them spoke as she started reading the paper, always jumping to the gossip section first. But this time the gossip was about her, and she saw her picture on the first page, their picture. On the picture Jesse was sitting on the middle looking at Rachel, while Rachel looked at Anna and Anna in turn was looking at Jesse. It had been taken just the night before.

Jesse saw her expression as she lowered the paper to the table and he could see their picture and the title "Ménage a Wicked?" He could feel her eyes on him.

"I'm sorry Jesse, I cannot do this anymore… I just can't…."

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**Stop the flames, it will get better! It was just missing some angst! And remember that reviews make me update fast! : )**


	14. Chapter 14

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**Don't pay attention to the timeline, it is kind of screwed up! Here's a nice long chapter for you, because you are so nice wth your reviews. Remember next chapter is the last! Enjoy!**

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No one suspected a thing. Rachel and Jesse were just the same, coming and going together as usual, everyone knew they were flatmates. Just flatmates. No one saw how sad and lonely Rachel was inside, or how Jesse was desperate and hopeless.

Even when their picture appeared on the gossip section of the paper, Jesse did not think that maybe Rachel was jealous; he just thought that the show, sudden fame, and their rekindled romance maybe were too much for Rachel, and he actually understood why Rachel needed to stop.

Rachel suggested moving out but Jesse would not hear of it, he wanted her to stay, since it was better to be with her even if it was only as a friend, than not being with her at all. They didn't talk much, since Jesse thought he understood her reasons, and she thought maybe he wasn't in love with her at all, and only thought of her as a friend with benefits. They did talk about how important their friendship was to the other, and that's what remained of their short-lived romance: just friendship.

* * *

It was weird at first, just being friends. But they both got kind of used to it, putting on their best showfaces when the longing for each other was at times unbearable.

Two months went by, and they were so busy with the show they barely saw much of each other at the apartment, they just went to bed. The only time they shared together outside of the theater was breakfast: Jesse would always make her coffee and have her paper ready. They didn't talk much even then; they just looked at each other and smiled. Jesse was convinced that Rachel would come around; he could feel that she somehow loved him, and he was willing to wait.

Rachel, on the other hand, was convinced that she only imagined that Jesse was in love with her. Ever since they broke up, he spent even more time with Anna and her friends. Sometimes, when they were having breakfast, she thought she saw something in his eyes. Was it admiration? Love? She could not decipher it, so she always averted her eyes from him.

It was Halloween and everybody was wound up about the big party the director was throwing at his townhouse: he requested that all the actors changed and came with different costumes. Rachel was talking to Kathy about her costume while she was applying her makeup, and she wanted to show her the Wonder Woman's cuffs she just bought when she remembered she had left her bag on Jesse's dressing room.

The door of his dressing room was ajar, so Jesse did not hear Rachel come in. Jesse was in there, with Anna in his arms. He was holding her and she had her fingers tangled in his head. He was laughing at something he said and then kissed her on the lips.

Rachel froze, she was paralyzed. He could hear him telling Anna:

"I'm glad you're smiling. You know, everything's going to be fine".

They didn't notice Rachel standing there, and did not see her leave. The egg that Jesse had smashed on her forehead all those years ago felt like a pat on the head compared to this. Rachel did not only feel her heart breaking, she felt like she was just breaking inside. There was no showface that could take care of it, this was not mere drama queen stuff, she felt actual physical pain in her chest, and she could not breathe. Somehow she made it back to Kathy, and sat on the chair very carefully, as if too much movement could shatter her.

"Where are those cuffs, girl?"

Kathy asked when she sat again on her chair.

"Why the face, Rachel? Are you okay?"

Rachel could only nod, she knew that if she talked she would start crying uncontrollably. But she could not help a few tears, and now Kathy was worried. Rachel mustered the courage to just say:

"I'm just a little homesick."

"I'm sorry babe, but you need to stop crying so that I can get this makeup on!".

She cried silent tears when Fiyero kissed her. She cried again when she was holding hands with Jesse receiving their usual standing ovation, and she cried in the cab all the way to the airport.

The cab driver did not look at her green skin twice; after all, it was Halloween. Neither did the flight attendants. Her tears subsided once she got home to her dads.

* * *

Jesse was worried sick about Rachel, she just disappeared. He thought he saw her cry, but he wasn't sure. She was acting strangely though, and he needed to talk to her, he needed to find out what was wrong with her. But she wasn't at the party, and she wasn't in his apartment when he left the party earlier looking for her. She did not answer her phone or any text messages. It wasn't until he threatened to call the police and report her missing the next morning that she answered a text message.

"I'm in Lima. See you Monday."

Rachel felt better at home, and by the nest day, the pain in her chest didn't hurt so much. Her dads encouraged her to go out and breathe fresh air, and she complied, thinking it would do her good. She went to the farmer's market to pick up fresh fruit, and there she met him.

"Rachel, is that you?"

She turned around to see Finn Hudson.

"Finn! It's so good to see you!" Rachel jumped into his arms.

They spent the rest of the weekend together, just talking and reminiscing about the good old glee club days. Rachel had forgotten how simple being with Finn was, how effortless things were with him, no intense drama to deal with. Her dads did not exactly approve of Finn, but they trusted their daughter's good judgment completely. Finn took Rachel to the airport, and he kissed her goodbye, his kisses as sweet as she remembered. But Rachel was not ready to get back with Finn again, she had done that before and it hadn't been her brightest idea. Finn was too shallow and bland for her, but she had to admit she even had fun that weekend. Jesse had certainly moved on, and so could she.

* * *

Jesse was happy to see that Rachel had gone back to his apartment. He thought that maybe she'd never come back to him, but he knew that the show was too important. Nonetheless, she was different, he could feel it, she was not his Rachel. This Rachel was cool and detached and dramaless. She still smiled at him during breakfast, still shared a cab with him every day, but it was all wrong. And now he was really scared: Rachel may not come around back to him after all. He needed to act, to do something to win her back. The situation was insane, why couldn't they be together? Did he bring upon himself all of this because he never said "I love you" in the present tense? He definitely needed to act fast.

Rachel had good and bad days, but she made sure no one would notice a bad day. Apparently Jesse and Anna were not an item anymore, even though they still talked and spent time together. And Rachel had resigned herself to just be friends with Jesse. She was sure that was what he wanted, and she made peace with that reality, after all, she was the one to blow him off in the first place. She was starting to feel good again, in fact she was going to ask Jesse to do something for her birthday, which was a week away, but then the weirdness started again. She didn't have time to tell him.

"Jesse, what are you doing next weekend? I was thinking that maybe we could…"

"I'm going back to Ohio to a friend's wedding." He interrupted.

Hope swelled in her chest, maybe he would invite her, but he burst her little bubble immediately.

"Shelby will be my date, more than a wedding, it's a Vocal Adrenaline reunion, and I can't wait to see everyone, it's been ages!" he quipped. "Why, what's there to do next weekend, so close to Christmas?"

My birthday. My twenty first birthday. The day I can actually buy a drink by myself.

"Nothing… Just asking."

She asked Anna as soon as she got to the theater, but she also had plans, as did Kathy and most of the people she asked, most were going home for the holidays, and she would do the same, her dads did know about celebrating birthdays! But then her dads informed her that they would be spending the holidays in France, and her birthday didn't even come up in the conversation.

Although a bit deflated, Rachel was determined to do something for her birthday, she really wanted to celebrate. They had two weeks off, and Rachel wanted to take advantage of her much needed time off. But at the theater he saw Jesse and Anna whispering to each other, they didn't see her.

"Jesse, but what will she think? I like her and don't want to lose her friendship."

"She'll be okay with this Anna, I assure you. But she needs to know, the sooner the better".

Rachel didn't cry then, and even though her chest felt heavy again, she was determined to overcome it, she was stronger now.

"To hell with them, I don't need them".

Still, when she woke up on her birthday, she was feeling good. She wore a big smile to breakfast, only to receive her daily coffee and paper. Jesse had forgotten about her birthday, but she would not let that ruin her day. She remembered the applause and praise at the end of the show the night before, and decided to make the best of their upcoming vacation.

But at theater no one remembered her birthday either. Everyone was minding their own business, making plans that did not include her. Jesse had brought his bag from the apartment, he would go straight to the airport.

He hugged her before leaving, she almost cried when she felt him so close to her.

"I feel bad that we're all leaving you alone this weekend! But you can do some last minute shopping, and I'll be back on Monday. We'll figure what to do for Christmas then". He kissed the top of her head before leaving. "Have a great weekend, Rach!" he said as he waved goodbye.

Rachel was starting to think she would spend the day alone, not even her dads had called to congratulate her. It was the worst birthday of her life, but then Finn called, at least HE remembered her birthday...

Jesse felt a little guilty, but he knew she would forgive him later on. He had planned a surprise birthday party for her, even her dads were there. She would be delighted with the surprise, he knew how important birthdays were to her, especially this one. He invited her friends from Lima, her beloved friend Mark and even Shelby. He was sure that he would get her back now, she would know how much he loved her, and in case she didn't, he would tell her. He could not stand not being with her anymore, he needed her like he needed oxygen to breath, not having her felt like gasping for air the whole time.

Kathy was supposed to take her home, but Rachel left the theater before she got to her. Al least she answered when Kathy called.

"Girl, where the hell are you?"

"Nice talking to you too, Kathy.."

"Seriously Rachel, I wanted to take you to dinner or something, I did not forget today's your birthday!"

Rachel was touched, and accepted the offer.

"Great! I'll just go home to take a quick shower and I'll meet you at nine!"

The doorman of his building had called him: Rachel was on her way up. Jesse's apartment was completely silent, most of the guests were drama queens anyway and even their silence was dramatic. Everyone stirred when they heard her voice nearing the apartment. Jesse heard her laughing, he thought she was probably on the phone. He smiled in anticipation of what would happen next.

But then he heard it. A male voice. She wasn't by herself. He felt a crush on his chest.

She was not alone. Rachel was not alone...


	15. Chapter 15

**Wow, your reviews have been amazing, I'm a very happy camper right now! So girls, this is the end of the story, I wish I had the ability that so many of you have of writing many great chapters, but I don't, I guess I must have some ADD because I get bored with my own story and just feel like writing another one! I hope you enjoy the ending, it's a bit cheesy, but who doesn't like fluff? I do!**

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But then he heard it. A male voice. She wasn't by herself. Jesse felt a crush on his chest.

She was not alone. Rachel was not alone...

* * *

Jesse could see the questioning looks on everybody's faces; wasn't Rachel supposed to be alone?

He heard the sound of Rachel's laugh, along with a masculine voice. Then silence, and shortly afterward her voice again.

"Please, don't"

He could hear her key turning the lock. And the door started to open and then stopped.

"But Rach, I can't believe you're still upset about St Jerk. He doesn't care for you like I do, he didn't even remember…"

"Don't call him St Jerk. And don't call me Rach…"

"I don't get it…"

Rachel now pushed the door open.

"Forget it Finn. Let me just…" she said while turning the light switch on.

Jesse couldn't help but experience in slow motion the next few seconds. Never in his worst nightmares he could imagine she would get home with Finn. Fucking Finn Hudson.

Rachel dropped her keys and put her hands to the sides of her face in a surprised gesture, she was positively astounded. For a long second her eyes and her smile were on Jesse, as if he was the only one in the room.

The first thought in her mind was not of the people standing in front of her, but of Jesse. He remembered. Jesse remembered! Then she saw it: Jesse's genuine smile replaced by his showface as his eyes focused on a spot behind her. Only she could tell.

"Surpise!"

She laughed as she was showered with confetti. Her eyes were already full of tears.

One of her dads picked her up and spun her around as he hugged his daughter.

"But, you were in Paris! I thought you'd forgotten!" Her tears were now flowing freely down her face, as she hugged her other dad.

"How could we forget? Believe us, we were suffering the whole day, but Jesse wanted this to be an authentic surprise!"

Jesse did this for her. She met his eyes and ran to him, and like her dads had done, he spun her around while holding her tightly, and suddenly it was only the two of them. Jesse tenderly wiped Rachel's tears with his thumbs as he pressed his forhead against hers. Her hands were around his neck.

"Happy Birthday baby…" He gave her a short firm kiss on her lips and gave her a full genuine smile again.

And then she remembered. She had been so deliriously happy and entranced in the surprise that she forgot about him, she forgot that Finn was with her. Damn him.

He was standing next to them.

"Hey Jesse" he extended a hand to him.

"Finn" Jesse returned his handshake.

It was an awkward moment, as they stood face to face looking at each other, Jesse with a furrow brow and Finn with a defiant smirk. Jesse was not going to play his stupid game, so he nodded to him and left.

"Oh God, Mark!" She couldn't believe even her best friend was here, her firnds from home, her mom… "I'm so glad you're here!"

"Well, thanks to Jesse my understudy will be a happy man for two days. He wouldn't take no for an answer…"

"Wait, did you say two days?"

"Yeah, Jesse planned everything for tomorrow too. I'm telling you, if he wasn't such a good actor he'd be a terrific events planner!"

Rachel looked at him confused. Mark looked around as he got closer to her and almost whispered as if sharing a secret.

"He's been planning this for more than a month. He called everyone, made travel arrangements for everyone and paid everything. We all offered to help but there was little we could do. He had done everything, he even paid the hotel where we're staying in advance! He even got you a vegan cake."

"What?"

"Shhh, he made us promise we wouldn't tell you anything and here I am babbling 2 seconds after seeing you! He paid airfare, and even had a car waiting for us!"

Rachel was dumbfounded as she looked around for the first time since she got there. The place had been transformed from great to magnificent. She could only imagined how hard it must have been for him to plan all of this in secret, and for the first time in months she felt that he truly loved her.

Anna interrupted her thoughts.

"Oh Rachel, you really thought we wouldn't celebrate your birthday!" Anna said while hugging her. "I hated to see you so sad today, I just wanted to tell you but Jesse would have murdered me!" And then she planted a big kiss on Rachel's lips before hugging her again.

Rachel tried to hide her surprise as Anna let her go and Kathy came up to hug her too.

"Happy Birthday girl! And don't worry about Anna and her bad habits, she kisses everybody in the lips, it pisses me off sooo much!" Kathy then placed a lingering kiss on Anna's lips, as Anna embraced her and returned the kiss. They separated to find Rachel looking confused.

Anna took her hand.

"Rachel, I wanted to tell you but I just couldn't. I thought you were kind of conservative and I didn't want to ruin our friendship. It wasn't until Jesse told me that your dads were gay that I felt I could tell you, but I couldn't find the right time…"

Rachel was now smiling at her. Now she understood.

"Did you really buy that we were just roommates?" Kathy asked. "I was surprised, I mean, it's kind of obvious!"

"Oh God, I'm so sorry I wasn't that nice to you Anna… I think I might have been jealous…"

"But Rachel, you've been so nice to me! And why would you be jealous of… Oh!"

Anna covered her hand dramatically. She seemed dumbfounded.

"You thought Jesse and I…. Oh Rachel! Poor thing, we're just friends, we've been friends for a long time, didn't Jesse tell you I got him the audition for the show?"

Rachel was now downright embarrassed.

"No… I mean, maybe he tried, but every time he brought up your name in conversation I changed the subject… I thought he was going to declare his love for you... Oh, I've been so stupid, I'm sorry!"

"No, it's not. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I've been your stronger supporter, didn't you know? Jesse and I talk about everything, especially you!" She laughed while purting her arm around Kathy.

"I remembered Kathy used to be jealous of him too! As if!" she chortled.

"I used to hate how close he was with Annie, I truly hated his guts! You know, there he was, this hot guy who could have any girl he wanted and he was alone, he just spent time with us. At first I thought he was in the closet, but then I realized he wasn't gay, he just wasn't a manwhore!"

"Kathy! We knew you were the one the moment he auditioned, he couldn't stop looking at you Rachel. And then he told us about your history together, and we cried like babies! And believe me, Kathy NEVER cries!"

Rachel laughed with them as she felt a heavy weight being lifted from her chest. She smiled sweetly at Jesse, he was talking to Mark but smiled back. She was beyond happy, she felt something that can only be described as inner peace.

She laughed when her dads started the karaoke and started singing (and acting) together "You've lost that Lovin' Feelin".

Then she felt a hand on her back, Finn had been talking to Tina and Shelby, but now he was behind her. "Hey birthday girl…"

She felt bad for Finn. He hadn't been invited to the party, he probably spent a lot of money coming to New York just to surprise her.

"Finn…" He didn't let her finish.

"Wanna sing with me, for old times' sake?"

"Okay." Maybe if she sang with him he'd leave.

He started singing:

"I've got chills, they're multiplying.

And I'm losing control…"

Jesse flinched as he heard his singing voice. How tacky, ugh. It was supposed to be the perfect night, what the fuck was he doing here, that moron oaf? He gave them a fake smile as he made his way to the bar. Why was Rachel singing with him, she was even flirting. .Fuck. he thought as he downed a drink. He was not about to let him ruin the night, he went through a lot to put the party together for her, just for her. Maybe he needed to play Finn's stupid game after all, and he was better.

Anna saw Jesse's serious face, and she could tell he was jealous of the big guy with Rachel. So as soon as the song was over Anna pulled Rachel apart from Finn and started talking to her.

Finn went to the bar and asked for a drink, as he turned to Jesse.

"So how's it going man?" He was still wearing that idiot lopsided smirk, and Jesse did his best not to show how much he disgusted him.

"Great, it's actually going great Finn" He downed another drink.

"Well excuse me, there's something I need to do. Enjoy the party"

Rachel was looking for Jesse, she hadn't been able to spend time with him at the party, and she just wanted to be with him. She heard glass clinking, maybe her dads were planning a toast. But then she saw Jesse sitting at his piano. She felt her chest tighten when he announced:

"This song's for you Rach."

The party went absolutely quiet and Jesse's slender fingers danced elegantly through the keyboard. For a second Rachel didn't recognize the song, but then he started singing:

_She_

_May be the face I can't forget_  
_The trace of pleasure or regret_  
_May be my treasure or the price I have to pay_

_She_

_May be the song that summer sings_  
_May be the chill that autumn brings_  
_May be a hundred different things_  
_Within the measure of a day_

His voice was full of raw emotion, and Rachel hadn't seen him sing like that since those regionals almost five years back. He looked at her intensely as he continued

_She_  
_May be the beauty or the beast_  
_May be the famine or the feast_  
_May turn each day into a heaven or a hell_  
_She may be the mirror of my dreams_  
_The smile reflected in a stream_  
_She may not be what she may seem_  
_Inside her shell_

Jesse took his eyes off Rachel only to look at the sheet music and occasionally the keys he was playing. The music flowed effortlessly under his fingers, somehow he was conveying his feelings through the instrument in from of him, and Rachel did not fight the tears that came to her eyes. She stepped closer to him, standing at the edge of the piano.

_She_  
_Who always seems so happy in a crowd_  
_Whose eyes can be so private and so proud_  
_No one's allowed to see them when they cry_

_She_  
_May be the love that cannot hope to last_  
_May come to me from shadows of the past_  
_That I'll remember till the day I die_

Rachel stood amazed watching him play for her, she didn't even feel the tears streaming down her face as she put her hands over her chest. This song was for her. His voice then was more powerful than ever, the whole room was hypnotized by him, the music vibrating gracefully on every surface. Jesse shut his eyes tightly as if to prevent his own tears from falling.

_She_  
_May be the reason I survive_  
_The why and wherefore I'm alive_  
_The one I'll care for through the rough in ready years_

He opened his eyes to look at her again, not fighting his tears anymore.

_Me_  
_I'll take her laughter and her tears_  
_And make them all my souvenirs_  
_For where she goes I've got to be_  
_The meaning of my life is She_  
_She, ohhh….. She._

* * *

He looked down to his hands as he finished, taking a deep breath. The room stayed quiet for a while; there was not a single dry eye in the room, the walls still echoing Jesse's passionate rendering. No one saw Finn leave. When he looked up he saw Rachel sitting next to him. He sighed before speaking.

"I meant every last word of that song Rach. You must know that you're everything to me. I love you, I love you so much…"

He was silenced by her lips on his, and he gently grabbed her head to deepen the kiss as the room exploded with applause.

"I love you too, Jesse. I've always loved you…"

* * *

Rachel awoke the next day in her favorite place in the world: Jesse's arms.

She didn't care anymore if she was too young or if they were moving too fast. She would not waste another minute of her life without him, she felt fortunate for having experienced true love at such a young age. This was epic, the only logical conclusion to their history, the upshot. She knew that she had finally found it, it had been right before her eyes: he was her home.

* * *

**I know the cheese alarm is going off in your heads right now, but I needed a fluffy ending after all the drama! The song is She by Elvis Costello, and I'm sorry if someone else has already used it, I haven't read any fics with it and it's such a perfect fit for St Berry and the story that I had to use it. I'm so incredibly grateful for all your comments and reviews, and I love how you all get entangled in the story, it's just great! You'll hear from me again soon, the husband is going on a business trip, which translates into five days of take-out and lots of time to write after work! : )**


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